Tag Archives: 40 weeks

2012 – today and far off

I have a new spreadsheet for weightloss stats. It has my starting weight from 2011 and then will have my first weigh-in for 2012. All of 2011 stats are archived. I like this because December was hard and I am back up 2-3 kg from where I was at the start of the month. So, a new spreadsheet gives me the opportunity to move forward, acknowledging how far I have come in a year but not worrying about the last month.

I have a new spreadsheet for recording training. I also have a calendar that my sister gave me which includes an exercise log for each month. I also have a small diary I will keep in my handbag that I might use to record exercise. I have looked at a few online logs but I don’t find them quite right (well suited for running but awkward then for other exercise workouts)… I am not sure what I am going to use yet but I have options and I will work it out. I will record my exercise. That much I know.

I have some books to re-read in relation to self awareness. I would have read them about a decade ago when I was doing alot of growing up very quickly. These books will be my starting point for the self acceptance development I want to progress.

I am going to try and do things differently in 2012 with regard to commitment and motivation. In 2011 I had my 40 week grand plan and it worked so well for changing my life. This year, I want my focus to be on ‘today and far off’ rather than one defined endpoint. ‘Today’ is every day, the choices I make each day that will get me to my ultimate goal of being healthy for life; which is the ‘far off’. To help me transition, I am going to look at a monthly committment and review. At the start of each month I will commit to my health and future, at the end of each month I will review. Part of my commitment each month will be weekly goals for eating and exercise but I hope that by reviewing and committing each month I will keep my motivation high while helping me transition. So, no grand plan for this year. My plan for this year is to normalise food and exercise into my life, to make those healthy choices part of my everyday. And to keep in mind the goal of healthy for life.

I want my attitude to be matter of fact with regard to food and exercise, building on the routines I developed this year. By matter of fact I mean less swayed by emotion and that this is just the way I live. That every day I choose to track my food because it helps me watch what I eat (I am going to keep tracking because it does work for me). It is not a big deal, it just is. And I choose to exercise regularly; summer and winter, rain and sun. It is not a big deal, it just is. I want to quietly go about my own way, looking after my physical and mental health.

2012 will see me keep going on my journey to a lighter plane of being.

40 weeks – done and dusted

My plan is a 40 week plan. I know what 40 weeks is like, it has a start and a stop and what I have lost in previous efforts was achieved in a similiar time frame but then I got lost. My 40 weeks starts Jan 3rd on a Monday. It will take me through to the first weekend in October. In 40 weeks I want to lose about 35kg. That puts me just above 100kg and is where I got caught last time. So I know I can get that far.
From my first post

Today is my 41st weigh-in and marks the end of my 40 weeks.

Starting weight: 140.9 kg (310 lbs)
Today’s weight: 96.5 kg (212.5 lbs)
Total lost: 44.4 kg (97.5 lbs)
% start weight lost: 31.5%

I was a size 24. I am now a size 16. (These are AU sizes – sizes everywhere are different. How confusing!!! But the actual number is not the main thing, the difference between the two numbers is the point!)

I was exhausted after a 40 min walk. I now am training to run a 5 K in 4 weeks!!!

I was uncomfotable in my body, I was self concious and ashamed of my size. I am now amazed that my legs can move me the way they do; I have curves, I can see my muscles move. My work pass now looks like I reacted to something I ate; my face is puffed up!!! (I have to grab a photo of that before I hand it back. I could do a comparison between my old and new work passes)

I used to be the biggest person in the room, didn’t matter where I was, it was usually the case. I am not the fat girl anymore. Now, I am just an ordinary looking girl. And I love that!!

I used to eat all the time, from boredom, from stress, just because something was there. And I ate too much refined sugar/fat. And my body felt sluggish and awkward because I was always eating. I now eat a much better variety of foods, with more fruit and veg, less fat and sugar. I feel hungry between meals – that is a good thing. Before I rarely got to the point of hunger between meals and I use my hunger now to guide me. I am satisfied with what I am eating; the amount and the variety. I have energy because my body is fueled with foods which give it what it needs.

The only before after comparison that is not favourable is that I have been cold all winter because I keep my body in a kJ deficit. And you know, that is one I can live with!!!

I have saved my own life this year.

Third Trimester Wrap

I thought I would have a look at the last 13 weeks today so that I don’t forget in all the excitement of the 40 weeks.

The last 14 weeks have been difficult. Work stress has resulted in some uncontrolled binging. I have had 4 gains in this time. But overall I have lost 9kg and I am happy with that.

Each time things went badly and I started using food as comfort or to suppress my stress, I did have some awareness that it was happening. I remember thinking things like this ‘things are hard, so hard, it is ok to stop and use any way you have right now to manage. but come tomorrow, there will be exercise and better eating. this is a way to manage today but not a way to manage long term. so for today and today only, it is ok to use food for comfort and food to forget’. And then I ate and felt the relief that came with that. And then I felt physically uncomfortable from overeating and I tried to remember that ill feeling for next time. It took 3 or 4 days after a binge to get back to feeling right again. The loss of that time frustrated me and I tried to remember that as well. The awareness of what was going on is a big step forward for me. It helped me limit my comfort eating and get back on track. So, I am glad that I have been able to learn a little about myself in this area.

I also know that I managed so well through this time because I had been exercising consistently leading up to it and I kept exercising through it. I don’t want to think about how difficult it would have been without having the exercise to keep me mostly sane. Having exercise challenges was a wonderful thing to have in place πŸ™‚ And walking buddies πŸ™‚

Apart from those times of really high stress, I did ok foodwise. There were also some social occasions I did really well at and some I did badly at. But I learnt through them, too. I did not cook as many new things but I did get the soupmaker and I am still having soup every day for lunch.

Exercisewise, I started jogging more in my walks and signed up for the Up and Running 5K course. In the week ending 18 August I was proud to be jogging for 2 minute stretches. Now I am halfway through the course and can jog 14 minutes! Amazing!!! Looking back, I have not done much resistance training. Maybe I should think about my routine and where I can make it fit because I think it is important. But I have exercised between 4 and 6 hours every week, usually getting in just over 5 hours. Exercise helps me feel strong and powerful.

I have noticed my shape changing alot in the last 6 weeks. I am enjoying my waist and I watch the muscles move in my legs. I can feel my hips and my pelvis. And I like feeling my ribs. I love my collarbones!!! This is my body and it is starting to look good πŸ˜€ I am also starting to wear clothes that cling to my curves.

People comment regularly now on my weightloss. And I talk about it alot. I am humbled that people look at me and are inspired to make changes to their own lives. That also helps remind me that what I have done is actually unusual and I am proud of what I have done.

There has been alot of good things in the past 13 weeks; good learning, good exercise and food, amazing support. I am happy.

Post 40 Weeks

I need to put some thought into what happens from Monday. Going into things without a plan is not a good idea for me; I am likely to get sidetracked when I don’t have clear goals and plans.

So, what happens from here???

I want to keep the current momentum going through to the beginning of December; so another 8 weeks. I have the Up and Running course which takes me through to the start of November and then I want to push through to December.

Up and Running gives me an exercise commitment. There are also running workout plans for the 5K level available from Up and Running that I can commit to once the course is over. I think this is a very good idea. Now that I am running and training I don’t want to lose it once the course is finished. I want to at least maintain my fitness in this area.

Generally, with exercise, I am getting in about 5 hours a week. That is 5-6 dedicated exercise sessions of about 40 minutes plus the incidental exercise to and from work 4 days a week which is an additional 20 minutes on those 4 days. I would like to keep up this amount of exercise; it fits into my life and it helps me stay sane. I know that no exercise is bad for my head; I feel that now when I miss as little as 3 consecutive days. But 5 hours a week is also not taking away from my other responsibilities. It feels like a good balance.

Foodwise, I like what I am eating at the moment, the food and the amount. My weekdays are pretty similar for breakfast, snacks and lunch. Dinner brings variation into the day. It is pretty easy and healthy. I like that weekends I have different breakfast options and greater flexibility for lunch and dinner. I am aiming for about 8000kJ a day at the moment and that allows me to have some treats but makes me think and plan my food. I like being aware. This amount of food is enough to lose weight but still support my body with the amount of exercise I do. And to maintain at a healthy weight, I would be eating about this amount of food so getting used to it is a good thing.

There are some variables which I will need to take into account. I start a new job in a new part of town at the beginning of November. That will impact starting and leaving times, where I park and the incidental exercise to and from the car and possibly my lunch time exercise. But I can work with this, I want to work exercise into my day so I will build it in right from the outset. It should also reduce my stress levels which would be a wonderful thing.

But then, what happens from December???

December and January are such social times. My thoughts are a little vague but I would like to track my food for most meals and snacks except for those social occasions, thinking of one or two a week. Most food then should be similar to what I am having now and that will give me some stability. Then, at social things, I will make healthy choices but try not be too concerned about not having total control. I would like to learn to trust myself a little in this area. I will plan to keep exercise going through the summer but might need to shift it to early mornings because of the summer temperatures. That is ok, I can do that. Over Christmas and New Year, I think my goal will be not to gain weight. If I can keep things stable that would be an excellent result.

I am also starting study next year. I am going to do a Graduate Diploma in Human Nutrition. I have found it so interesting to look at my food this year, looking at the kilojoules and macronutrients and building an eating plan that works for my body. And I want to learn more. The study is going to be a fascinating way to learn more and then I can look at applying it to me!

My longterm weight goal is 65 kg. If I can get to between 90 and 93 kg by the end of the year that will mean I have less than 30 kg to goal. I have lost 30 kg already, so that is not such a scary thing to think about. I know that the first 30 is different to the last 30 but I can apply the same principles. I am looking at consistency in my eating and exercise; making these patterns of behaviour ingrained; making healthy choices most of the time. That is what I want to do for the rest of my life; make healthy choices most of the time, live long and prosper.

weekend write up and measurements

The weekend was good. I made some good choices and I made some not so good choices. Good choices were walking both days, being sensible at yum cha and the party. Bad choices included 1 piece cookies and cream rocky road. I regretted that almost immediately because after I ate it I went to a park with the small one and we went on this spinny ride which made me feel sick. The sweetness and the greasy feeling in my mouth made me feel worse than I would otherwise. And it also wasn’t as good as I was hoping for!! Another bad decision was the lemon lime and bitters I got for a drink at dinner. My dad wanted to get us drinks, I had said no to alcohol, someone else asked for a LLB and I jumped in and got one, too. It was so sweet! I looked up the kJ value later and was shocked at how much that one drink contained. Next time, I won’t get a drink just to be polite. Better yet, I will work out a fallback drink option so I won’t get caught out again. And then, getting home yesterday, I was tired and hungry and I snacked and grazed all afternoon. Most of the damage I did on the weekend I did after I got back. I had planned for the social occasions and the travelling but I had given no thought to what happened once I got home. It is frustrating! Sometimes I think I have come so far and other times I see very little change in my behaviour. Small steps. I need to remember this is not about perfection, it is about improvement. And I can see so much improvement in this weekend!

And so, the scales are up a little today and I am not surprised about that. But rather than focus on that number, I thought I would take my measurements and post those instead πŸ™‚ I don’t take my measurements very often because they don’t seem to change that much if I do. Last time I recorded them was 3 months ago.

Bust – starting measurement: 130cm (52″)
Bust – 3 months ago: 117 cm (46.8″)
Bust – today: 107 cm (42.8″)

Waist – starting measurement: 137.5 cm (55″)
Waist – 3 months ago: 115 cm (46″)
Waist – today: 105 cm (42″)

Hips – starting measurement: 141 cm (56.4″)
Hips – 3 months ago: 124 (49.6″)
Hips – today: 115 cm (46″)

That is so very cool!!! I have noticed in the last month that my waist goes in. I like that my waist goes in πŸ™‚ I have been wearing clothes that show my shape off! It is really exciting. There are bits of me that I don’t like. I don’t like my hanging belly but I can also see it is getting smaller. I don’t like my flapping arms, I don’t like by baggy skin. But these parts of me also show me how far I have come. And I love my waist!

One thing I do for my skin is to exfoliate weekly and then apply moisturizer. I have an exfoliating glove and it is wonderful. I feel so clean and smooth after using it πŸ™‚ I started this routine in the hope that my skin will be stimulated to regenerate and so would shrink down. I think it has helped; at least I feel better for it than doing nothing.

I got alot of positive comments from my family over the weekend. My younger sister said she is so proud of me for taking responsibility for my health and my body. She has done something similar in the last few years, although not starting from as large a point as me. And she looks amazing. She is one of my inspirations so her saying that meant an awful lot. I talked with my older sister about some of the reasons we eat; how it is about comfort and acceptance and self-worth and trying to create new patterns. My cousin and her man saw me from the car as they were driving up and they did not know it was me. Most of my conversations at the party were about food or exercise or getting healthy; what I eat, what exercise I do, how much further I want to go; their plans for getting healthy and the action they are taking. It was encouraging and affirming. That I am an inspiration is a little alarming! I still have so far to go. But it is also such an honour to be told that someone looks at what I have done and they are inspired to make changes in their own lives.

This is the last week of my 40 week plan. There will be some reflection this week about how far I have come and where I want to go. I might look at some new goals for the summer to keep me focussed. This is not the end.

38 down, 2 to go!

Monday! Hurray!

I struggled to get up this morning. I wanted to lie in bed and stay all warm and cuddled up to my man. And then I remembered my Up and Running workout and my weigh in. And I got up.

I should possibly not have done my workout this morning after yesterday’s efforts. Week 3 workouts include 2 x 1km jogs with a 5 min recovery between. My legs felt heavy and while doing the first km I really doubted my ability to do the 2nd. I got there; I did it. Both kms had similar times, 7.16 and 7.17; total workout time was 40 minutes with a distance of 4.3km. Excellent work, I think πŸ™‚ My hips and legs were sore afterwards. I am definately having a rest day tomorrow.

My weigh in this morning was a good one. I have now lost 30% of my start weight! And my mind boggles that I have been doing this for 38 weeks now. Amazing πŸ™‚ Only 2 weeks until I have met my commitment to myself! It was so far away in January and now, it is just around the corner πŸ™‚

Starting weight: 140.9 kg (310 lbs)
Today’s weight: 98.4 kg (216.5 lbs)
Loss this week: 0.8 kg (2 lbs)
Total lost: 42.5 kg (93.5 lbs)

Spring has Sprung

This morning I got up and was going to do my DVD workout. And then I looked outside. The sky was just starting to lighten. It looked beautiful. I changed my mind and let myself quietly out the door into the cool morning. I have not been on early morning walks since mid May. But there is enough light in the mornings now and today it was not too cold. The clouds changed from grey to pink to white as the sun came up. I walked up the hill and did what used to be my hour walk in 45 minutes. I did some jogging but it was a little too cold for me – my arms were not moving smoothly and my breathing did not level out. I have missed my Monday morning walks πŸ™‚ It was beautiful and affirming.

I managed to reign in my eating back to my target kJ range in the last week. I did some really good workouts last week as well. I am very pleased that my stress has had minimal impact on my weight loss journey.

Starting weight: 140.9 kg (310 lbs)
Today’s weight: 103.3 kg (227 lbs)
Gain since last weigh in (2 weeks ago): 0.1kg (0.2 lbs)
Total lost: 37.6 kg (82.7 lbs)

I have 8 weeks to go until I complete the commitment I made to myself at the end of last year. 40 weeks. I was aiming for 40 weeks of healthy living; and now I have 8 left. This last month has been a hard one for me. I have already exceeded the goals I set myself at the beginning of the year but I don’t think that I can make my revised goals given the last few weeks. I have decided to not worry about the goals. I have a lot of very exciting weightloss milestones coming up – loss of 40kg, weighing less than 100kg (with a loss of 41kg), having lost 30% of my start weight (with a loss of 42.3 kg), loss of 45kg and loss of 100lbs (46kg). These milestones are very motivating for me and I am looking forward to marking them off. Actually, seeing the scales get closer to 100 is something I am not sure I quite believed would happen when I started out. But it is happening and it will continue. I also have some exercise motivation in the form of my Up and Running online running course. It starts in 3 weeks and will take me over the 40 week mark. So, I am not going to worry about the goals themselves because they will happen if I keep track of my eating and keep up the exercise. This is my focus for the next 8 weeks. Eat well, exercise consistently.

Celebrating success

I never did go for my massage after the first 13 weeks to reward myself. I was going to do it after 20 weeks but didn’t. I found out prices and went up to book but they were closed. And I did not get any further.

Today I went to a craft show and bought a dress. I wasn’t expecting dresses at the craft show. The style is a wrap around, tie it up, reverse the sides, can wear it in at least 10 different ways style of dress. There are many things I like about it. It is in my colours. It is gorgeous. It fits me now and it will fit me as I continue to lose weight. It was not cheap but if I had rewarded myself at 13 and 26 weeks like I had planned, I have come out about even.

I don’t have my dress yet. That is the other thing I like. I will get the dress in 4 weeks or so. I will have it for the beginning of october, when I celebrate completing 40 weeks of my plan.

This dress is my reward to myself, to celebrate my success, my body, my journey and my future.

10 weeks to go

I have started the countdown – 10 weeks to go in my original 40 week commitment. It is exciting! I feel good, I feel confident. I know I am struggling with work stress but overall, the majority of my choices are healthy ones and I am managing alright. The exercise really helps with the stress. So do the pots of tea that I have. I like my teapot at work πŸ™‚

This past week I exercised 7 days in the week. That hasn’t happened since the first week of July although I always aim for it. I usually get over 5 hours total even if it is not every day and I am happy with that. This week I got 5 hours 50 minutes exercise and was very happy with that, especially with the jogging yesterday. That was brilliant. My eating was on track all week except on one night when I was feeling a bit grumpy/hormonal/stressed. But it was only the one night. But these off track occasions are happening more frequently and I don’t like that it is so easy to slip into old patterns of stress management. This week I really don’t want to binge. Eating more than my target is ok for special occasions but binging is not ok. There are a couple of things this week which are special. We are going out for dinner and I have a birthday party to go to, a naming celebration and a gathering at my house next sunday. That is life – things happen and I will manage these occasions as best as I can.

So, stats πŸ™‚ I had a good loss this week and I am very happy with that.

Start weight: 140.9 kg (310 lbs)
Today’s weight: 103.2 kg (227 lbs)
This weeks loss: 1.5 kg (3.3 lbs)
Total lost: 37.7 kg (83 lbs)

I am getting very close to weighing less than 100kg. That will be a big goal achieved. That was my goal to reach by Christmas and I am almost already there. I need to think about my goals and plan post 40 weeks. That will be coming up in the next month. But not today, today I enjoy where I am.

6 months!

I have been watching what I eat and exercising for 6 months! People say that they are impressed I have kept at it and I was thinking about that because it feels easy for me. But that is one of the reasons I have been able to keep at it. Some of the key things for my plan are that it fits into my life now, I enjoy the food I am eating, I enjoy the exercise I am doing, it is easy to keep track of what I am doing, while I have a balanced diet I do have treats (whether that be chocolate or alcohol or biscuits) and I don’t feel deprived. There is flexibility and variation.

I also have some really clear goals; some are short term (this year), some are medium term (in the next 5 years) and some are life goals. Some goals are weight related but most are fitness and health related. And I really want to reach my goals. I really want it. My commitment to my future self supports my present self in making the decisions which will get me to my goals. And again, I don’t feel deprived.

I don’t feel overwhelmed by how far I have to go. I was overwhelmed at the start and a couple of times throughout but usually it is not an issue. On most days, I only look at what I need to do on that day. On weekdays, the only thing I need to think about is dinner because exercise and all other weekday foods are routine. Planning generally helps with that as well. On weekends I have a little more time and as long as I track as I go I can keep to target. A couple times a week I have a look at how I am travelling for that week in terms of exercise done and average kJ intake. Based on that I can make some decisions about what how I manage the rest of the week. And then occasionally I look at the short term, which I am doing at the moment. I am revising my goals for the rest of the year and celebrating my achievements so far.

It is constant. I put alot of work into setting up my plan at the beginning of the year and again 3 months ago when I moved to counting kJ. So, when I say it is easy I don’t mean that I don’t think about it or that I only think about it occasionally. It is constant and my food and exercise choices are conscious choices. But with my goals in view, enjoying the journey and not feeling deprived it means that I am happy to accept the constancy of watching what I am eating and counting the kJ. And occasionally, going above my target is ok but I really try to make it a conscious choice rather than mindless eating.

This weeks stats:
Starting weight: 140.9 kg (310 lbs)
Todays weight: 106.2 kg (233.6 lbs)
This weeks loss: 1.2 kg (2.6 lbs)
Total lost: 34.7 kg (76.3 lbs)

75 lbs – that is a cool amount to have lost. And I am also 2/3 of the way through my 40 week plan. In the last 13 weeks I have lost 13.4 kg. I have exercised 81 of the 91 days.

So, here is to another day, another week, another trimester and another 6 months of healthy living. And to icreased fitness and decreased clothes sizes as well πŸ™‚