Monthly Archives: September 2011

38 down, 2 to go!

Monday! Hurray!

I struggled to get up this morning. I wanted to lie in bed and stay all warm and cuddled up to my man. And then I remembered my Up and Running workout and my weigh in. And I got up.

I should possibly not have done my workout this morning after yesterday’s efforts. Week 3 workouts include 2 x 1km jogs with a 5 min recovery between. My legs felt heavy and while doing the first km I really doubted my ability to do the 2nd. I got there; I did it. Both kms had similar times, 7.16 and 7.17; total workout time was 40 minutes with a distance of 4.3km. Excellent work, I think ๐Ÿ™‚ My hips and legs were sore afterwards. I am definately having a rest day tomorrow.

My weigh in this morning was a good one. I have now lost 30% of my start weight! And my mind boggles that I have been doing this for 38 weeks now. Amazing ๐Ÿ™‚ Only 2 weeks until I have met my commitment to myself! It was so far away in January and now, it is just around the corner ๐Ÿ™‚

Starting weight: 140.9 kg (310 lbs)
Today’s weight: 98.4 kg (216.5 lbs)
Loss this week: 0.8 kg (2 lbs)
Total lost: 42.5 kg (93.5 lbs)


Official 4km race time: 30.24 minutes ๐Ÿ˜€

I jogged the first full km and the last full km. It was going to be too hard to work out the 500m lengths and when we started I just wanted to go. It has tricky to not run during the middle stretch. I wanted to go but I also really wanted to finish strongly. Somewhere along the route I calculated that I was expecting a time of about 32 minutes; that would be two 7 min kms jogging and 9min/km for the middle two kms. I was hoping for something about 32 minutes. That last km was amazing. I started off slowly because I was not sure how I would go, having already jogged 1km at the start. With 500m left to go one of the race officials cheered me on from his spot on the route. I got teary, I knew at that point I would finish well but I could not let the emotions go at that point! Then I rounded the corner and could see the finish. I started running. I had been jogging but I decided to finish as strong as I could. And it felt completely different to the jogging. A little like moving from a trot to a canter when horse riding, I guess. It was amazing. I loved it. And my man was there with my little boy. And I ran through the finish line and ran to them and I had done what I set out to do. I had run half of my 4km fun run. And I saw the time on the race clock at about 30 minutes and I was so thrilled!

I don’t have much going on in my life that gives me a buzz of satisfaction; that really intense high. New relationships are ‘buzzy’; or a passion for something can do that. When I work for something hard or challenging and achieve it, sometimes I get that feeling. I have enjoyed my exercise before, it helps give me some time, it helps my head work through stuff. I like feeling strong and like I am doing something for my health. I always assumed that I was getting the endorphin rush. But in the last couple of weeks, it has been more. I ran up the stairs at work on Friday after my walk, just to see if I could. I ran up to the third floor. And it was great! And crazy!!! I mean, who does that??? And today, it was cold and showers were forecast and I got dressed and went out!! Crazy! And I loved it ๐Ÿ˜€ I loved being part of the event.

I have 5 weeks till the next event. I am doing the same distance on the same route but I am registered for the run and not the walk event. I want to run the whole 4km. I have a time to beat, some new goals. I have Up and Running training to take me there.

I am tired now. But I had a lot of fractured sleep last week so that is not surprising. But more than just tired, my legs are tired, my back is tired and I am happy. I want to do it again.

Let’s get ready to rumble!!!

This morning I am doing a 4km fun walk/run. It has been raining overnight and there are showers predicted for this morning. And I am up, in my gear, having a light breakfast and getting a change of clothes ready to take with me. My enthusiasm for exercise takes me by surprise occasionally!

My plan for the walk is to jog half of it. I want to jog the last km to the finish line. But I would also like to jog half of each of the first three kms. So, this is my game plan.

I woke up with a headache. I don’t know – stress catching up with me, not enough sleep lately, I ate junk last night because of said stress. But I woke and needed painkillers. They have started to work and the drums behind my eyes are easing now. Not a good start to the morning. But I will do this fun walk/run.

One of the reasons I want to do it is because it is part of a 2 event series. The second is on the 30 October and I plan to run that one. I want to know the course, have some idea of the atmosphere so that I don’t get too overwhelmed next time. Also, for doing both I get the T-shirt, bag and something else. I can’t remember.

I don’t know if my man is coming today. The plan was always that he would come to see the end rather than have to come early while we do the registration and warm ups. But it is not so easy with the weather and bringing the toddler. But I know I have lots of support from friends and family who have been with me on this journey who will be cheering me on this morning. And if my man can’t make it today, he will be cheering me on as well.

I am tired. Most of my sentences begin with ‘and’ or ‘but’. I need to start moving again. I will post about how it went later today.

Move it on out, girl… you will feel better for it

Lower back ache and general discomfort and grumpiness. I hate this time of the month. The best thing I have found to help with the pain is exercise. The thing I want to do least right now is exercise. I will fit it in today, even if it is a walk to the shops with my boy. The sun is out, it is a beautiful day. I will go to the shops soon. And tomorrow morning I have my Up and Running workout planned. I will do that one.

On Monday at work I was at a morning tea for a colleague who is going on leave. There was a little speech by her boss. I was sitting on a 2 seater couch with 2 other people. There were three of us and we were sitting comfortably!!! That absolutely thrilled me ๐Ÿ™‚ I got good comments on what I was wearing as well. And it might be my imagination but I am starting to get appreciative looks. Actually I don’t care if it is my imagination ๐Ÿ™‚ I am enjoying the idea of it.

My special dress arrived last night, the one I bought at the craft fair, that helps me celebrate my 40 week commitment and my success so far. (See Celebrating Success) I tried it on and it is beautiful. I love that it is the style that I can keep wearing as I lose weight – it is a wrap it up, tie it up dress. So, do I wear it to a picnic this weekend or do I wait till I complete my 40 weeks?

Official Weigh In Monday – Less than 100

Yeah Baby!
I got up this morning and jumped on the scales. I am so happy to be reporting on my stats today!

Starting weight: 140.9 kg (310 lbs) 3 Jan 2011
Today’s weight: 99.2 kg (218 lbs)
Loss since last Tuesday: 1.2 kg (3 lbs)
Total lost: 41.7 kg (91.7 lbs)

I am so thrilled :)To be less than 100kg was my goal for Christmas. And I have done it! My mind struggles to accept this because it seemed so far away when I started and I still have ‘fat girl’ as part of my identity. But ‘healthy for life’ is getting stronger; committing to the Up and Running program is really helping build this new aspect of me. (See Kaleidoscope View for more about what this means)

I had an excellent week last week. I exercised on 6 days, averaging at 47 minutes. Not including Saturday, my kJ intake averaged at 7900/day. And at the party, I did well.

I also asked for help last week and that was a big step for me. My man was amazing and his love and support was so evident in the way he helped me with the post party clean up. I have no idea what happened to all the left overs. For that I am extremely grateful.

Today I will celebrate. I will celebrate my weight loss and improved health and fitness. I will celebrate my waist and my curves. I will celebrate that I am strong and beautiful.

Post party wrap

The party was a lot of fun. We had a lot of people here and my man had a wonderful time.

And I did ok. At some point in the afternoon I got my chewing gum out. I wanted to eat – there were so many yummy things about but I could feel I was full. Chewing gum helped trick my brain for an hour. I did something different to the weekend before! I didn’t have any alcohol during in the afternoon, I know that I find it harder to focus when I have had a few drinks. But I also don’t like feeling deprived. So, I made some iced strawberry tea and mixed it with soda water and it tasted great and looked fab and it did not matter that I was not drinking alcohol.

After the party, it had been arranged that some of the girls with small ones would go out and have some cocktails. It was fun to dress up and go out and have some very pretty drinks. I had the fruity drinks rather than the creamy ones. And I looked very good ๐Ÿ™‚ I wore a black fitted velvet sleeveless top with flattering pants. I felt good.

Today I am doing well. I did not sleep all that well, a sure sign that I had too much rich food yesterday. But this morning I am in a good place. I stepped on the scales and they are up but I have kept it below the three digits. I have had a light breakfast and I have been for a 60 minute walk up the hill. I am drinking plenty of water and now I have had my coffee my brain is working again. I will plan lunch and dinner soon to make sure there are fresh vegetables, some protein and carbs; simple and healthy. My man actually did most of the putting away last night when I was out. And he is amazing, there is actually very little food in the house that I would want to snack on today and take me off track. He is the best man.

I want to sleep well tonight, I have my Up and Running workout tomorrow morning ๐Ÿ™‚

party prep – mental and actual

I am tired! I have most things ready for the party tomorrow, including carrot sticks, capsicum sticks, cherry tomatos and strawberries all ready to go. The cake I made is one I have had before and because I know what it is like I think I will be able to resist it. And I have a morning tea at work on Monday to go to where I can take some of the left overs. I have a pretty new dress to wear. And I have lost that digit off the scale again and I am keeping that in my mind. And I have my third Up and Running workout tomorrow morning.

I have done really well this week with food and exercise. I am very happy with that.

My little one has been sick this week with a cold and teething. It has made the week more stressful but there were a couple of times where I looked after myself first which meant that I could look after him better.

Week 1 of Up and Running training

Yesterday I did my first workout for the Up and Running online course. I like the course so far. It looks good, it is well structured. There is alot of support from Shauna and Julia and from the other women doing the course. The first week was all about getting ready – motivations, goals, where to run. And this week the running starts. There are three workouts a week and I will substitute them for some of my routine workouts.

Part of the motivation/goal stuff was about going in fun runs. Signing up and paying to be in a race is a real motivator. So I went looking for events in Canberra and I have signed up and paid for a series of two events. The first one is a 4km walk on 25th September and for the second event I signed up for the fun 4km run at the end of October. My money is down, I am telling people about it, I am going to run in a race! That is something real to work towards ๐Ÿ™‚

So, yesterday, I got up at my normal monday morning time, got dressed and went out. It was cold. I checked later and it was about 0’C when I was out and there was a light frost. I had planned my route over the weekend and set off with the instructions written down on a post it note clutched in my hand.

Week 1 workout 1
Total length: 4.1km
Total time: 41 minutes
1km walk: 8.59 minutes
1km ‘faster’: 7.09 minutes

I knew from a couple weeks ago that I could jog 1km, so I was expecting to be able to do that. But usually my walk/jogs are during my lunch break at work. The cold made the jogging harder and I was very happy that I completed the faster km by jogging the whole km.

I will do the same route for the other two workouts this week so I can compare numbers.

In the cool down, after jogging for 1km, I started singing in my head. I still am thrilled to have started ๐Ÿ˜€

Tuesday weigh in…

Yesterday I got up early and did my first running workout with Up and Running. That was excellent – and needs to be the subject of its own post.

But I want to backtrack to Saturday first. I ate too much on Saturday. Then on Sunday I started off with a light breakfast, small morning tea and sensible lunch. I had baked a cake to take to a friends christening and the cake was too warm when I was slicing it and it crumbled… and I ate some of the crumbly bits….

Sunday afternoon and evening I slipped into ‘I don’t care, I am going to eat whatever I want’ mode. It is one of those crazy modes where I don’t know how to break it. So, I overate. Chocolate, nuts, more cake, crackers. And I was not hungry and I started feeling so full I was uncomfotable. I don’t understand it now trying to write about it.

So, Monday morning was the first morning for Up and Running. I went out, did my work out, came back and jumped on the scales. And got what I expected and deserved. But I also know my system and I decided to give it another day to keep moving. This morning I got on scale again. And I will take this weight and say that is ok – up just over a lb from Saturday and about the same as last week.

Today’s weight: 100.4 kg (221 lbs)

I am frustrated with myself. I am either in control or have no control. There does not seem to be a middle ground. If I stop tracking in a day it is almost as if ‘don’t know, don’t care’ comes into force.

This weekend is going to be interesting. We have a party on Saturday. There will be food that I prepare and food that other people bring. There will be left overs. I can see the same thing could happen again and I don’t want it to. I want that number to stay below 100! So, I need to do things differently. I need to be able to enjoy the party but not forget that I want to be healthy. I need to put things out of sight after the party so that it is easier for me to stay on track the next day. I might buy a special bracelet or wear a special tie about my wrist that I can touch or flick to remind myself to do things differently.

I am not going to beat myself up about my choices on Saturday or Sunday. But I want to learn from them. I am strong, I am determined. I also want to find balance but I don’t think that is something I can work out this week. That is a long term goal.


It is my man’s birthday today. We had a small party yesterday with cake and a BBQ. Knowing that the party was happening, I weighed myself yesterday morning… 99.8




If I knew how to increase the font size I would write it a few more times ๐Ÿ˜€

And then, with the cake and the BBQ I ate more than I should have. It was all healthy stuff. But I just ate too much. Needless to say, I did not get on the scales this morning.

The funny thing is today, I am not hungry. Well that is not funny so much. But even though I am not hungry, I want to eat. Part of it is that I usually have a standard breakfast but today I just had a piece of toast and my latte. And for morning tea I had a small handful of almonds. And I am not physically hungry but my head is telling me to eat.

So far I have resisted. I am drinking green tea and herbal tea. I am just about to break out the chewing gum. I want to make healthy choices today. I want to see 99 on that scale again really soon.

But I got there! I lost a whole digit on the scale and I wore my special pink T-shirt that is a size 16 off the rack to celebrate, even though it was so cold yesterday.