Today I went shopping on my own. I might just type ‘on my own’ again. I had an hour before I was meeting up with my toddler and his grandparents and I really did not know where to start. I thought of getting coffee and reading in peace. I thought of going to the new chocolate store and getting chocolate and reading in peace. But I decided to look in some clothes shops. I have been buying clothes in the larger sized shops for so long. Now that I am losing weight, I need to look in the regualar shops and get some idea of what they sell.
I wandered around the shops. I was looking for something in pink to wear to a breast cancer fundraiser in a months time for a colleague. I don’t wear alot of pink, I am not that fond of it. I was being picky about what I looked at and I finally found some things that I thought would look good and be appropriate to wear to work. I took some sizes into the change rooms and tried them on. The size 16 clothes that I had selected fit. They are a little tight but in a month they will be spot on. The size 16 fits. That I will say again, as well. The size 16, off the shelf from a regular store, fits.
Size 16 AU is a 12 US or a 14 UK. In January, I was a size 24 AU (20 US, 22 UK).
And so, I am going to say again. Size 16 fits.
I remember wearing size 18 clothes in my final year of highschool. I was 18. I don’t remember when I work size 16 last. We are talking maybe 20 years ago.
My brain is really struggling with the idea that I am a normal size. I kept repeating to myself as I bought the clothes today I am just a normal girl. I am not the fat girl any longer. I am so glad I bought the evidence because it will take a while to sink in. Evidence is reassuring. I know I still need to lose weight. I know that I am not there yet and I don’t want to stop here.
I don’t get to go shopping on my own often. I so appreciated the opportunity today. I now have something to wear to a breast cancer fundraiser that will look good on me. I am healthy and strong. I am so fortunate. I want to stay healthy and look after my body. I want to be there for my family as I grow older. I am going to enjoy wearing these clothes I bought today.